We are starting a little series over here at Say It Sis about girlfriends. Why do they matter? Why do you need them? Maybe you’ve had lots of girlfriends over the years. Maybe you haven’t. Whatever your story is you should definitely have some close girlfriends. They are essential for the soul. They tell you it’s fine when you eat the whole Ben & Jerry’s pint in one sitting. They listen. They care. They help. Today we are specifically talking about making new girlfriends after you first move to a new area. Let us know your experience making new girlfriends in the comments!
Anyone who has ever moved to a completely new place–as in you know NO ONE–can attest that making friends is crucial and intimidating. Where do you start? How do you know if a friendship is worth investing in. Anyone you meet won’t know what you were like in high school. They won’t know your parents or who your first boyfriend was. Basically all the things that have made you, you, they won’t totally understand.
Some of my closest girlfriends and I often comment how we wish so badly we could have gone to each others weddings. What kind of dress did you choose? What flavor was your cake? Did you have dancing? Agh, we would have had such a good time celebrating together.
I’ve had one cross country move and one cross continent move. What I’ve learned from both experiences is that I need friends where I am. Friends from a far for sure have a place and we will get into that another week but I’m talking about friends where you physically are. Friends you see on a regular basis who care about how your PTA meeting went. They know your schedule and they understand your surroundings.
Honestly most of my friends come from the places I hang out the most: Church and my son’s school. So, first things first. Introduce yourself. I usually say, “I don’t think we’ve met, I’m Ashley.” Then I stick out my hand for a handshake. Don’t be afraid to be the first one to put it out there. Someone has to do it! After chatting for a little bit if you feel like this person is someone you want to hang out with suggest meeting up for something simple–taking kids to the park or meeting for tea. Making good girlfriends takes time so don’t expect to be besties in an hour. You have to ask questions, listen and be vulnerable. You have to be willing to share some of the things from your past. You know it is a good friendship if you are getting out of it what you are putting into it.
If you have a few friends already invite them all to get together for a girls night. These can be as simple as meeting at a restaurant for dinner or going to someones house for hot chocolate and takeout. If you are finding conversation is difficult try setting up a book club where everyone knows what is going to be talked about.
It’s been my experience that everyone is looking for close relationships. They make our world such a better place. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and organize an informal meetup with women in your area.
Ladies need ladies. It is just a known fact.
We would love to know how you go about making new friends.